I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
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