do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
