tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
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