So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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