dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
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