Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
everyone is single if you try hard enough
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
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