I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
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No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
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