I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
Randomize
