The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
Who put my cat in the fridge?
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
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