doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize
