I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
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