i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
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