Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
Randomize
