Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
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