It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
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