Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize
