Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
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