I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
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