The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Randomize
