i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
Randomize
