i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
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