A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
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