A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
If you don't answer the phone then I will be forced to leave you a wonderful voicemail of me throwing up
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
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