did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck