i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
I wish my new phone didn't autocorrect so well. People will never experience the magic of my drunk texts because they think I'm making a coherent statement.
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Randomize
