You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
Randomize
