Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
I will pee on everything he values.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
