i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
Randomize
