when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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