I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Randomize
