I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
Randomize
