yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
Randomize
