I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
she pinky promised me she was 18
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
okay, but you can't tell anyone. Every time he instagrams something with the caption "avocado," it means he's booty calling me. Happy?
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
