There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
Randomize
