i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Randomize
