I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
Randomize
