I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
