I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize