Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
Randomize
