At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
Randomize