man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
Randomize
