I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Randomize
