I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
Randomize
