maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
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