imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
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