the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Randomize
