She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
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