im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Randomize
