She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
I woke up and found my apartment really clean, appearantly drunk me couldn't tolerate living there anymore and left sober me a lot of insulting post-its...
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
Randomize
