Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Are we still banned from the library?
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
