okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
wtf are you talking about? You vomit-splattered the cop from the balcony. The cop YOU called because you drunk-dialed 911 because a 5 year old ate the last donut.
it was a krispy kreme
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
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